Pep Talk to Self.

I know it's still September, but three months from now, the year 2008 will be in the past. 

People say it all the time, but it really is funny how time flies. I still feel like we just rung in 2008, but now, summer's over and fall is about to start - and my life is definitely much different now than ever before. Aside from turning a year older last August, I finally finished my undergraduate studies, got my degree, and am now living back home with Mom and Dad. I guess I could say that some of my dreams came true - I finished school in time, with good grades and even better memories; and I came back home with a different perspective on life and my future. I learned how to communicate in a new language, am well-versed in film theory, and found out a lot of things about myself that I never knew before. I not only developed a better sense of self but also better study habits, something that I definitely did not expect to gain this past year. 

Thanks to my fulfilling undergraduate experience, I feel much better now about staring life's challenges in the face. I learned that I can do anything if I really put my heart and mind to it - because I actually put that mantra to the test. Trying my best in school, in relationships, and in improving myself as an individual really do pay off in the end. I have never felt more motivated and inspired in my life. Despite being currently unemployed, broke, and at times, morbidly bored at home, I somehow feel a little tingle inside me - a sign that I look forward to a better, seemingly brighter future. At this point in my life, I can't be anything but thankful, for everything that's gone my way thus far. The positives are definitely outweighing the negatives. I'm pursuing what I love - something that, in the long run, will have the biggest pay off for me, which is why I don't mind sacrificing for now and just trying to do whatever I can to get by. My eyes are so set on my goals for 2009 - and some may think I'm crazy, but I believe anything is possible. I will live in France. I will go to grad school. I will write a screenplay that will be made into a film, be able to attend the Oscars, and be able to look back at this moment in time when all I had were eyes full of hope. I know I'm insane, but if I wasn't, I don't think I'd be as motivated as I am now. 

I spend more than half my days dreaming, and I could care less if people say there's something wrong with keeping my head in the clouds. With all the ugliness that surrounds the world we live in, the only way I know I can survive and keep smiling is if I kept my head held high. I will hold on to every ounce of hope and faith - because right now, that's about the only thing I can control. I can't force things to fall into place for me, but what I can do is believe that it is possible. Call me crazy - but I'm just a girl with big dreams. Enormous, unhinged dreams.