It's A Fight For Love.

I'm slowly learning that loving somebody is not the easiest thing to do.

It doesn't matter how giddy you are, or how ecstatic that person makes you. It doesn't matter how often they take you out, or how amazing their gifts are - heck, it doesn't even matter what they say because at the end of the day, if you have even just a tinge of doubt in your mind about whether this person is really sincere or not, you can't possibly claim that you love them. We often say (so mindlessly) that trust is the foundation of every strong relationship, but we don't really see just how true this is until we're put in a situation where that trust is risked. I say this because I've experienced it. I guess you could say I became complacent - overconfident, even; but I think spoiled would be a better word to describe me. I became so spoiled that I never thought I'd ever have a reason to question my relationship. 

Contrary to what I thought, I am not exempt from feeling paranoid and doubtful - but that's because I never had a reason to feel that way. From the beginning, I've always felt so lucky to have been blessed with the kind of partnership that was so strong, certain, and secure. At the time it seemed like there was no stopping us; there was nothing in this world that could possibly change anything. It was amazing. But it was foolish of me to ignore the possibility that this might be threatened someday; I mean, after all, this is not a perfect world, and we were bound to come across something unpleasant. It's one thing to understand that relationships aren't meant to be easy; it's another to decide whether or not you'd like to work through the rough patches together.

After a few moments to myself and an emergency phone call to my mom (who was intensely congested when she gave me advice), I realized that the choice was mine to make. I could, 1). walk away and escape the potential heartache, or 2). fight for it, move on and start anew. The difference between the two lies heavily on whether or not I love that person enough. And apparently, I do...because I chose number 2. Like my mom said, there are some things in this world that really are worth fighting for. 

Here's to hoping I don't lose in the end.